One of the challenging aspects of human existence and life is having and maintaining a healthy and productive relationship. Relationship, as you might have known, has been defined and categorized by different groups and institutions in our society: the government; religious community; evangelical churches; human rights organizations; and the gay and lesbian community.
Relationship, as a subject, ranges from marriage, single, to divorce and separation.
The question is WHAT IS RELATIONSHIP?
In the context of what we are focusing on:
A relationship is a formative process by which an individual or group of individuals are seeking or have an ongoing dialogue, friendship, engagement, or betrothal, culminating in marriage.
A relationship is an act of being involved with another individual or person other than you.
This subject when discussed in the context of the Church brings God into the discussion.
Why do we need to bring God into the discussion? Because, there are out there, lots of broken hearts, mentally ill patients, and divorcees due to relationship trauma, misconception, and misuse.
“My people are destroyed for lack of knowledge. Because you have rejected knowledge, I also will reject you from being priest for Me; Because you have forgotten the law of your God, I also will forget your children.” Hosea 4:6 (NKJV)
According to divorcerate.org, What is the current divorce rate in America?
It is frequently reported that the divorce rate in America is 50%. This data is not accurately correct, however, it is reasonably close. The Americans for Divorce Reform estimates that “Probably, 40 or possibly even 50 percent of marriages will end in divorce if current trends continue.” which is actually a projection. “50% of all marriages in America end in divorce.”
Because of fear of divorce, cohabitation is on the rise.
Today, cohabitation is a common pattern among people in the Western world. People may live together for several reasons. These may include wanting to test compatibility or to establish financial security before getting married. They might see cohabitation as a way of being single, they do not consider themselves as single but they are neither looking for a spouse. Also, couples prefer to cohabitate because it is a similar way of being married but they don’t have any legal commitment with their partners.
Let’s ask some interesting questions?
HOW CAN I FIND A MATE? First of all, recognize that finding a mate, which is the same as wanting to get married, is OKAY and right for anyone who is matured for it. Pro.18:22.
Mate or life partner is different from just a friend. Another word for “mate” is what the Bible calls “Help Meet” Gen.2:18. Asking the question — “how can I find a mate?” is to ask the question“AM I READY FOR MARRIAGE?”
Being ready for marriage is not dictated by the growth of your hormones, changing body features, hardship, aging, or family demands. Marriage is more than feelings, falling in love, enjoying the presence or company of another, or sharing the same culture, values, thoughts, or likes.
Before you start thinking of marriage, ask yourself the following questions: what level of spirituality do I have or this individual whom I am thinking about?; what level of understanding do I have about relationship or marriage?; what level of preparation do I have?; how financially capable are my mate and I?; do I have the emotional maturity to engage, handle, or deal with the stress associated with marriage?; am I ready for raising a family?; what about my thoughts about family?
MARRIAGE IS FOR LIFE.” Matt.5:27-31; 19:1-11.
YOU DON’T FIND A MATE BY DATING. A popular view has it that, knowing who to get married to or have as a life partner comes by way of friendship and friendship comes by spending time with each other. But know this, acquaintance or spending time with an individual can be deceptive and have coined many into cohabitation where they are trapped and supposedly, the partner no longer wants to tie the knot.
“You find a mate by PRAYER, WAITING AND BEING LED BY THE HOLY SPIRIT.” Genesis 24:1-26; Ro.8:14; 2 Cor.6:14-18.